This is another example of that. We start off with a couple of miscues then do the final bit, all without stopping the camera. It's funny... but smooth it ain't! Enjoy!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Pudding Endorsement - Ad #3
As you've noticed, we shoot the videos on the fly, usually with zero discussion over what will be said. Occasionally, we stage something but mostly it's "Hey! I have an idea! Here - start filming!" and then I wing it.
This is another example of that. We start off with a couple of miscues then do the final bit, all without stopping the camera. It's funny... but smooth it ain't! Enjoy!
This is another example of that. We start off with a couple of miscues then do the final bit, all without stopping the camera. It's funny... but smooth it ain't! Enjoy!
Ack! So Far Behind!
My goodness! Here I thought Edamame Man was going to continue posting for me, at least for a while. I suppose the Gravy Train rolled by and he hopped aboard! I apologize for the confusion - I owe you a couple of updates, don't I?
Event 39 in the 50@50 Project found us in the quaint little town of Aurora, OR for the Aurora Colony Days 5k. It was an early run - fine with me! Get 'er done and get home for Shark Week on the Discovery Channel - that was my plan. Of course, I sold it to Camera Crew as 'get 'er done, get home to do her laundry'. It worked! The race was slated to begin at 7:30; we arrived a little after 7 = perfect timing.
Aurora was founded in 1856 as a sort of commune. Originally called Aurora Colony, it was named after the daughter of its founder, Wilhelm Keil. For the record, her name was 'Aurora', not 'Colony'. Read all about the history of this Oregon gem (the colony, not the daughter) at www.oregonencyclopedia.org/entry/view/aurora/ Or, hell, just head south on I-5 and visit, fer cryin' out loud. Read all the historical markers around town! Visit one of the many antique shops! Dine at at the minimart/gas station deli! Okay, kidding about the last one. Seriously, a cool little town!
After checking in and saying hello to the Huber Timing team, we were reviewing the course map and getting oriented when the race director, Shari, came up to us and explained it all! "Hi, do you need some help?" "Oh, wait - you're holding the map all wrong!" She was very helpful and sweet, actually. Then she surprised us by saying "Wait a sec - you're that guy who's doing the 50 events this year!"
I'M FAMOUS!!
Okay, okay - I'm sure a little bird named Heather mentioned it to her. But still - it was pretty awesome.
The crowd gathered and everyone was excited. It was another of the cool neighborhood-y events, where everyone knows everyone. People were...
I love you!
Aw, see - I let Camera Crew have access to my blog and she leaves me little notes. She's a keeper.
Anyhoo, people were chatting and visiting, having a good ol' time. Entire families were out to do the race together. Some were splitting up, with adults doing one of the longer distances (5k or 10k) and the little ones waiting for the kids race. It was a charming scene. Alas, these moments are typically ruined by the air horn signifying the start of the run.
The race started in the historical district and the route took us through some of the older neighborhoods in Aurora. There are some neat old homes here! We went past a school and a sizable park, running two laps to make up our 3.1 miles. It was a great event, well done by the organizers. The course was well marked and even if it wasn't, there were volunteers at every turn pointing the way. We finished up in very respectable times, best times we've had in a while, actually. We hung out at the finish, cheering on the other finishers and soaking up the community feel of Aurora. It was pretty fantastic. We also watched the kids race, which is always a blast.
After a bit, we wandered across the road to tour the antique vendors lining the street for the weekend festivities. Plenty of cool stuff but nothing we urgently needed! We hopped in the SUV and drove up the road (and then back a bit, cuz we missed it the first time) to the White Rabbit Bakery. I had coffee, Camera Crew had tea and we shared some delicious pastries. Check out their website at www.whiterabbitbakery.com - it says the website is under construction but most pages loaded.
We left Aurora and decided to take the back roads home. This was a wise decision because... we found the Pudding River yet again! So we did another commercial for a sponsor. This makes them very happy and keeps us rolling in pudding. Sexy, huh?
I love you!
Aw, see - I let Camera Crew have access to my blog and she leaves me little notes. She's a keeper.
Anyhoo, people were chatting and visiting, having a good ol' time. Entire families were out to do the race together. Some were splitting up, with adults doing one of the longer distances (5k or 10k) and the little ones waiting for the kids race. It was a charming scene. Alas, these moments are typically ruined by the air horn signifying the start of the run.
The race started in the historical district and the route took us through some of the older neighborhoods in Aurora. There are some neat old homes here! We went past a school and a sizable park, running two laps to make up our 3.1 miles. It was a great event, well done by the organizers. The course was well marked and even if it wasn't, there were volunteers at every turn pointing the way. We finished up in very respectable times, best times we've had in a while, actually. We hung out at the finish, cheering on the other finishers and soaking up the community feel of Aurora. It was pretty fantastic. We also watched the kids race, which is always a blast.
After a bit, we wandered across the road to tour the antique vendors lining the street for the weekend festivities. Plenty of cool stuff but nothing we urgently needed! We hopped in the SUV and drove up the road (and then back a bit, cuz we missed it the first time) to the White Rabbit Bakery. I had coffee, Camera Crew had tea and we shared some delicious pastries. Check out their website at www.whiterabbitbakery.com - it says the website is under construction but most pages loaded.
We left Aurora and decided to take the back roads home. This was a wise decision because... we found the Pudding River yet again! So we did another commercial for a sponsor. This makes them very happy and keeps us rolling in pudding. Sexy, huh?
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
The Return of Edamame Man and Blueberry Tart
Well, well, well. Seems we have to bail out the mortals yet again. No, no - I am not speaking of saving a child from a burning building or leading the Miami Dolphins to a winning season or fixing the mess in Washington DC. I am not so certain anyone has the powers to do the latter two, anyway. I speak of participating in this 50@50 Project for our earth friends, Dave and Camera Crew.
The 38th event for them was the Parklane Superhero Scramble. Parklane Park is located in 'deep southeast' Portland, near SE 155th and Main Street. Back in the day the area the park now occupies was an airport and a gravel quarry. The park was established in the 1970's and the neighborhood installed playground equipment that was painted in red and white stripes. Thus, for years the nickname for the park was 'Candy Cane Park'.
We knew not what we were getting into upon entering this competition. We knew only that it was a short race with 15 activities that we would have to complete, spread throughout the course . We were sure the 'activities' would be superhero caliber undertakings like 'thwart evil mastermind's plan to take over the world' or 'zap evil henchmen without harming any humans' or 'pass a fair immigration reform bill into law'. It sounded intriguing and mysterious, although the last time Edamame Man was asked to make a showing at a park, it was rather embarrassing.
Aquaman had asked me to make a special appearance at a 'Save the Whales' fundraiser he was throwing. I thought I would sign autographs, pose for pictures, speak to children - you know, the usual superhero role model schtick. I arrived at the speaking engagement ready to wow the crowd, as I usually do. And what a crowd it was! A mass of earth children crowded the front, all giggles and laughter. How exciting for them to be in my presence. I was asked to climb into a 'podium' and perch precariously on a small bench seat over a large tub of water. I thought "This is a rather odd podium from which to address the earthlings about nutritious snacks." I was reviewing my notes, deciding if I should open with a joke, when I was startled from my thoughts by a loud 'THWACK'!!! Ambushed!! I knew it! As a superhero, I am always ready for action. Unless my costume is at the dry cleaners, of course.
I was alone - Blueberry Tart had wandered off to find a 'dog of corn', some sort of earthling stick food served at outdoor events such as these. I would have to deal with this on my own. Looking up, I saw a line of small earthlings cheering, like a crazed mob. The children!! There was one standing in the front, holding several spheres in his hands. He reeled back and launched one of the projectiles in the direction of the cage-podium, specifically toward a small metal plate to my right, outside the cage-podium in which I was now trapped.
'THWACK!' He missed again, the sphere striking a tarp hanging behind the cage-podium and metal plate. A collective groan arose from the mob. Someone shouted "Billy throws like his Gramma!!" With that, several other children stepped forward and starting launching spheres, as well. 'THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!" I was in serious trouble! Being a superhero, I quickly surmised that the obviously brainwashed children were not aiming at me but at the metal plate instead. 'THWACK!' Either that, or children of this planet are all related to Billy's Gramma. With the wire mesh protecting my front, - 'THWACK!' - they could not have hurt me anyway.
Little known fact: as a child I owned an Erector Set. Yes, Edamame Man was once a child. Using the engineering expertise acquired from building contraption after contraption, hours and hours spent alone - all by myself, waiting for friends to call, knowing deep in my heart they never would, I traced the connection from the metal plate to the swing arm to which it was attached. 'THWACK!' This was connected to a trigger-type mechanism, made up of a spring and a pin; the pin was inserted into a hinge, which kept the hinge from, well, hinge-ing. And the hinge?
It was on the other end of the bench upon which I found myself sitting!!! Holy Deep Fried Twinkies!!! If one of the spheres hit the metal plate, it would cause a - 'THWACK!' - chain reaction that would - 'THWACK!' - culminate in...
'CLANGGGGGG!'
'KER-SPLOOOOOSH!!!"
Very funny, Aquaman!
So, where was I? Oh, yes. The Parklane Superhero Scramble. We arrived at the park in the Edamame Mobile and were excited to see Dave's earth sister and brother-in-law. What a pleasant surprise! They came out to cheer on Dave and Camera Crew but didn't seem too disappointed to find SUPERHEROES instead!! As I and Blueberry Tart prepared for the race, a young earth boy dressed as Batman walked by with his mother. The boy looked at us and said "Whoa, Mom! Look at them!", pointing at us. Or probably at me, actually.
We checked in for the race, receiving a 'passport' in which we would obtain 'stamps' upon completing various and sundry 'tasks'. Fifteen of them, to be exact. Much like the other run we did for our mortal friends, I scanned the crowd and ONCE AGAIN didn't see anyone dressed as Edamame Man. I was assured by Blueberry Tart that the costumes are probably still on back order due to such high demand for the approaching Halloween season.
I am beginning to think that Blueberry Tart is - how do the mortals say it - bovine excrementing me.
We received final instructions from the race director, then we were off!! The first stop was at the Multnomah County Sheriff's booth, where we were sworn in as Junior Deputy's. Then it was over to the paramedics booth, where Blueberry Tart had to bandage my arm, which I found to be a silly exercise as I was not injured in the least. We threw frisbees at targets, juggled balls, walked on stilts, flew a kite, solved complicated mathematics equations (12 x 4 / 2), and performed many other earthling activities. The last thing we did was plant a watermelon seed!
Having completed all tasks and received all stamps, we flew to the finish line!!
This was a short event but a fun one. It seemed the entire neighborhood had turned out for the evening. There were food vendors, a rock climbing tower, arts and crafts, our Superhero Scramble. There was even a photo booth where mortals could pose with cardboard likenesses of their favorite superheroes. You guessed it - Edamame Man was not one of them. (Note to self: Fire agent) And to rub salt in the wound, the entire Parklane community night out was culminating in a showing of 'The Avengers'. Hulk, Thor, Ironman, blah blah blah.
Thanks a lot, Parklane.
The 38th event for them was the Parklane Superhero Scramble. Parklane Park is located in 'deep southeast' Portland, near SE 155th and Main Street. Back in the day the area the park now occupies was an airport and a gravel quarry. The park was established in the 1970's and the neighborhood installed playground equipment that was painted in red and white stripes. Thus, for years the nickname for the park was 'Candy Cane Park'.
We knew not what we were getting into upon entering this competition. We knew only that it was a short race with 15 activities that we would have to complete, spread throughout the course . We were sure the 'activities' would be superhero caliber undertakings like 'thwart evil mastermind's plan to take over the world' or 'zap evil henchmen without harming any humans' or 'pass a fair immigration reform bill into law'. It sounded intriguing and mysterious, although the last time Edamame Man was asked to make a showing at a park, it was rather embarrassing.
Aquaman had asked me to make a special appearance at a 'Save the Whales' fundraiser he was throwing. I thought I would sign autographs, pose for pictures, speak to children - you know, the usual superhero role model schtick. I arrived at the speaking engagement ready to wow the crowd, as I usually do. And what a crowd it was! A mass of earth children crowded the front, all giggles and laughter. How exciting for them to be in my presence. I was asked to climb into a 'podium' and perch precariously on a small bench seat over a large tub of water. I thought "This is a rather odd podium from which to address the earthlings about nutritious snacks." I was reviewing my notes, deciding if I should open with a joke, when I was startled from my thoughts by a loud 'THWACK'!!! Ambushed!! I knew it! As a superhero, I am always ready for action. Unless my costume is at the dry cleaners, of course.
I was alone - Blueberry Tart had wandered off to find a 'dog of corn', some sort of earthling stick food served at outdoor events such as these. I would have to deal with this on my own. Looking up, I saw a line of small earthlings cheering, like a crazed mob. The children!! There was one standing in the front, holding several spheres in his hands. He reeled back and launched one of the projectiles in the direction of the cage-podium, specifically toward a small metal plate to my right, outside the cage-podium in which I was now trapped.
'THWACK!' He missed again, the sphere striking a tarp hanging behind the cage-podium and metal plate. A collective groan arose from the mob. Someone shouted "Billy throws like his Gramma!!" With that, several other children stepped forward and starting launching spheres, as well. 'THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!" I was in serious trouble! Being a superhero, I quickly surmised that the obviously brainwashed children were not aiming at me but at the metal plate instead. 'THWACK!' Either that, or children of this planet are all related to Billy's Gramma. With the wire mesh protecting my front, - 'THWACK!' - they could not have hurt me anyway.
Little known fact: as a child I owned an Erector Set. Yes, Edamame Man was once a child. Using the engineering expertise acquired from building contraption after contraption, hours and hours spent alone - all by myself, waiting for friends to call, knowing deep in my heart they never would, I traced the connection from the metal plate to the swing arm to which it was attached. 'THWACK!' This was connected to a trigger-type mechanism, made up of a spring and a pin; the pin was inserted into a hinge, which kept the hinge from, well, hinge-ing. And the hinge?
It was on the other end of the bench upon which I found myself sitting!!! Holy Deep Fried Twinkies!!! If one of the spheres hit the metal plate, it would cause a - 'THWACK!' - chain reaction that would - 'THWACK!' - culminate in...
'CLANGGGGGG!'
'KER-SPLOOOOOSH!!!"
Very funny, Aquaman!
So, where was I? Oh, yes. The Parklane Superhero Scramble. We arrived at the park in the Edamame Mobile and were excited to see Dave's earth sister and brother-in-law. What a pleasant surprise! They came out to cheer on Dave and Camera Crew but didn't seem too disappointed to find SUPERHEROES instead!! As I and Blueberry Tart prepared for the race, a young earth boy dressed as Batman walked by with his mother. The boy looked at us and said "Whoa, Mom! Look at them!", pointing at us. Or probably at me, actually.
We checked in for the race, receiving a 'passport' in which we would obtain 'stamps' upon completing various and sundry 'tasks'. Fifteen of them, to be exact. Much like the other run we did for our mortal friends, I scanned the crowd and ONCE AGAIN didn't see anyone dressed as Edamame Man. I was assured by Blueberry Tart that the costumes are probably still on back order due to such high demand for the approaching Halloween season.
I am beginning to think that Blueberry Tart is - how do the mortals say it - bovine excrementing me.
We received final instructions from the race director, then we were off!! The first stop was at the Multnomah County Sheriff's booth, where we were sworn in as Junior Deputy's. Then it was over to the paramedics booth, where Blueberry Tart had to bandage my arm, which I found to be a silly exercise as I was not injured in the least. We threw frisbees at targets, juggled balls, walked on stilts, flew a kite, solved complicated mathematics equations (12 x 4 / 2), and performed many other earthling activities. The last thing we did was plant a watermelon seed!
Having completed all tasks and received all stamps, we flew to the finish line!!
This was a short event but a fun one. It seemed the entire neighborhood had turned out for the evening. There were food vendors, a rock climbing tower, arts and crafts, our Superhero Scramble. There was even a photo booth where mortals could pose with cardboard likenesses of their favorite superheroes. You guessed it - Edamame Man was not one of them. (Note to self: Fire agent) And to rub salt in the wound, the entire Parklane community night out was culminating in a showing of 'The Avengers'. Hulk, Thor, Ironman, blah blah blah.
Thanks a lot, Parklane.
Saturday, August 10, 2013
A Good Thing - Forever Changed
I love going wine tasting. I enjoy everything about it. I've almost always ventured out on these sampling trips with my wife, the lovely Camera Crew. And usually with other good friends joining in on the fun, as well. The more, the merrier! I have a lot of great memories from these trips, a ton of awesome photos, and have brought home many many MANY fabulous bottles of wine.
I love to pack a small ice chest with some nice cheeses and charcuterie, maybe some grapes, perhaps blueberries or strawberries. Toss in some nice crackers or a crusty-on-the-outside, chewy-on-the-inside baguette and head to wine country, baby! The drive out of town is like a time warp. Even though we do most of our wine tasting within an hour or so of Portland, it feels like we're hundreds - even thousands - of miles away, in another state or country. Ahhhh, the rolling hills, the ranches and farms, the quaint towns, friendly people, the endless vineyards...
The endless vineyards...
The...
...endless...
...vineyards.
AAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!
Thanks, XDog! Thanks a big ol' heap for ruining wine tasting for me for the rest of my life!!!
Event 37 in the 50@50 Project was the inaugural running of 'Whine on the Vine', a +/- five mile excursion with several obstacles added in, just for 'fun'. This is a new event in the 'repertoire of pain' that Kevin puts together each year for XDog Events. I love this guy, really. To give credit where it's due, the event was organized by a young man named Kalvi. Kalvi put this race together as a fundraiser for the Newberg Lacrosse Team, of which I'm sure Kalvi is somehow involved. I never heard if he is a current player or a coach or an alum of the high school. Regardless, he did an amazing job marketing this event, organizing all the details and making it happen. Kevin has a worthy heir to the XDog throne, should he ever choose to spend more time on his other hobbies. I'm sure he has other hobbies, right? No? Really?! Wow. Okay, then...
The event drew the usual beautiful people of XDog. We love this crowd! In fact, I just had one of those epiphany thingies: XDog calendars made up of the most awesome pictures from the past years' events, with the new, upcoming events in the calendar. (Kevin - I give you this idea for free, as long as I get my picture in there somewhere.) 'Whine on the Vine' was held at J. Albin Winery in Hillsboro. They are a small, family owned and operated winery, open by appointment only, as well as on the usual Memorial Day and Turkey Day weekends. And after the success of this event, we hope they agree to open their beautiful vineyard and tasting room each year for XDog Events. www.laurelvineyard.com Hit 'em up on one of their open days! Or better yet, run 'Whine on the Vine' next year!
Another special part of the day: Since Kalvi did all the work, Kevin actually ran the event! The man has set up 300 or so races and never run them himself. This was indeed a treat. (Bleed, Kevin. Bleed!)
The race started in XDog fashion, with the infamous conch shell. We ran along the outside edge of the vineyard, then we started about 6-7 trips UP and DOWN the rows of grapes. You see, grapes grow best in this region on south facing slopes - they get the best sun, the coolness of the mornings, good water. So our zig-zag through the vines were downhill, then uphill, then downhill, then uphill, etc. We then looped around a big field and had a few obstacles to deal with. A set of three sawhorse-type barricades, increasing in height was the start. The first I could step over easily, the second I had to hoist my leg up but could still touch the ground, the third was about stomach level so required a hop up onto the 4"x4" that made up the top of the obstacle followed by a rather clumsy swing and fall off the other side. Graceful, ain't I? Then we hopped up onto a small platform and down the other side. There was another set of the sawhorses, this time tallest to shortest.
We ran along the field toward the woods at the bottom of the hill. There was a wire fence there so we went over on a slanted wall with ladder rungs. There was a guy we were pacing with who was running with his two dogs. It was pretty cool to see one of the dogs actually climb up the ladder! The owner had to help him down the other side; the other dog took a short cut around the fence. Once we made the trees, the route wound along a trail. It was a pretty warm day so the shade was a nice break. As we lost elevation, we knew were gonna wind up clamoring up at some point. Um, yeah. After a stop at Temptation Station #1 and enjoying a hunk of maple bar, we continued on. After a gradual climb, we came to a road. The course route wasn't clear and the runners in front of us went right and I started to follow them, at least until I could find the trail again.
But Camera Crew to the rescue!! "Hey, guys! It's over here!"
Left. Got it.
We yelled at the people that had made it up the road a ways to make sure they turned back, then we started down a VERY steep hill. Loose dirt and lots of brambly shrubs and branches. The footing was slippery! There wasn't much 'running' - it was more about not getting hurt. Besides some scratches and scrapes and thorny vines, we made it to the bottom. At one point, I heard a woman behind me up the hillside yell "Aaaghh! Owwww! Stickers! Stickers! Stickers!!" Yikes.
We climbed back up out the ravine, refilled water bottles then made our way back toward the vineyard. After trudging up a dirt road and negotiating a long line of tires a la football practice high stepping, it was time for the supersized slip n' slide.
For me, it was a great run down the slope. My Redhook hat flew off, sitting right smack in the middle of the run about halfway down. No worries - Camera Crew snagged it on her way down, in between screams. When I got to the bottom, I was going so fast I shot off the end of the plastic, rolled several times in the mud and wound up in the shrubbery. It was so off-the-charts awesome that I received the 'Big Slipper' award, something of which I am very proud to have earned. Think about it: I was the first winner of this award at the first running of the race. That's, like, history happening right there in front of your face, people!
Camera Crew still has night sweats from the slip n' slide. She claims to have PTSD, in fact. But she did get my hat, which was very nice of her, considering she was in the midst of extreme terror.
In fact, here is Free Gift to Kevin #2: I named the slip n' slide for you.
You should call it Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. And here's why:
From a distance, it looks pretty great and totally obtainable; as you get closer, you realize it's way better than you thought and you're getting excited; but you're wondering if you should even take a shot at it, fearing it might just be out of your league; you decide - what the hell - you're going for it; you hop on, wondering what the ride will bring; it takes a little persistence to get the thing going; then it takes off so fast, you're actually a little afraid; it's bumpy and fast and exciting and scary, all at the same time; the next thing you know, it's done with you and it dumps you so fast your head spins; you find yourself in the mud and sticker bushes, a quick check to make sure you're not hurt; you stand up, feeling all manly, a look back up the hill, a big ol' smile, then - WOOOO! - you want to do it all over again!!! But you know you can't look back because it would never be as good as it was. In fact, you realize you just avoided dying.
After a trot back up the hill to the vineyard, we zagged and zigged our way back through the vineyard, reversing what we did on the way out. I'll admit - I was beat. Camera Crew kept me going and we finished up 'Whine on the Vine'. I would say that it was one of the harder XDog Events. We ate watermelon and had mimosas made with J. Albin's brut rose bubbles. After the awards were handed (Big Slipper, thank you) we settled in on the deck of the tasting room, enjoyed a bottle of pinot gris and pretzels. We also brought home a bottle of bubbles. We drank that later, after a good chilling.
Whine on the Vine - a huge success. Great work Kalvi and Kevin! Bring this one back next year!
And good luck to Newberg's lacrosse teams!!
I love to pack a small ice chest with some nice cheeses and charcuterie, maybe some grapes, perhaps blueberries or strawberries. Toss in some nice crackers or a crusty-on-the-outside, chewy-on-the-inside baguette and head to wine country, baby! The drive out of town is like a time warp. Even though we do most of our wine tasting within an hour or so of Portland, it feels like we're hundreds - even thousands - of miles away, in another state or country. Ahhhh, the rolling hills, the ranches and farms, the quaint towns, friendly people, the endless vineyards...
The endless vineyards...
The...
...endless...
...vineyards.
AAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!
Thanks, XDog! Thanks a big ol' heap for ruining wine tasting for me for the rest of my life!!!
Event 37 in the 50@50 Project was the inaugural running of 'Whine on the Vine', a +/- five mile excursion with several obstacles added in, just for 'fun'. This is a new event in the 'repertoire of pain' that Kevin puts together each year for XDog Events. I love this guy, really. To give credit where it's due, the event was organized by a young man named Kalvi. Kalvi put this race together as a fundraiser for the Newberg Lacrosse Team, of which I'm sure Kalvi is somehow involved. I never heard if he is a current player or a coach or an alum of the high school. Regardless, he did an amazing job marketing this event, organizing all the details and making it happen. Kevin has a worthy heir to the XDog throne, should he ever choose to spend more time on his other hobbies. I'm sure he has other hobbies, right? No? Really?! Wow. Okay, then...
The event drew the usual beautiful people of XDog. We love this crowd! In fact, I just had one of those epiphany thingies: XDog calendars made up of the most awesome pictures from the past years' events, with the new, upcoming events in the calendar. (Kevin - I give you this idea for free, as long as I get my picture in there somewhere.) 'Whine on the Vine' was held at J. Albin Winery in Hillsboro. They are a small, family owned and operated winery, open by appointment only, as well as on the usual Memorial Day and Turkey Day weekends. And after the success of this event, we hope they agree to open their beautiful vineyard and tasting room each year for XDog Events. www.laurelvineyard.com Hit 'em up on one of their open days! Or better yet, run 'Whine on the Vine' next year!
Another special part of the day: Since Kalvi did all the work, Kevin actually ran the event! The man has set up 300 or so races and never run them himself. This was indeed a treat. (Bleed, Kevin. Bleed!)
The race started in XDog fashion, with the infamous conch shell. We ran along the outside edge of the vineyard, then we started about 6-7 trips UP and DOWN the rows of grapes. You see, grapes grow best in this region on south facing slopes - they get the best sun, the coolness of the mornings, good water. So our zig-zag through the vines were downhill, then uphill, then downhill, then uphill, etc. We then looped around a big field and had a few obstacles to deal with. A set of three sawhorse-type barricades, increasing in height was the start. The first I could step over easily, the second I had to hoist my leg up but could still touch the ground, the third was about stomach level so required a hop up onto the 4"x4" that made up the top of the obstacle followed by a rather clumsy swing and fall off the other side. Graceful, ain't I? Then we hopped up onto a small platform and down the other side. There was another set of the sawhorses, this time tallest to shortest.
We ran along the field toward the woods at the bottom of the hill. There was a wire fence there so we went over on a slanted wall with ladder rungs. There was a guy we were pacing with who was running with his two dogs. It was pretty cool to see one of the dogs actually climb up the ladder! The owner had to help him down the other side; the other dog took a short cut around the fence. Once we made the trees, the route wound along a trail. It was a pretty warm day so the shade was a nice break. As we lost elevation, we knew were gonna wind up clamoring up at some point. Um, yeah. After a stop at Temptation Station #1 and enjoying a hunk of maple bar, we continued on. After a gradual climb, we came to a road. The course route wasn't clear and the runners in front of us went right and I started to follow them, at least until I could find the trail again.
But Camera Crew to the rescue!! "Hey, guys! It's over here!"
Left. Got it.
We yelled at the people that had made it up the road a ways to make sure they turned back, then we started down a VERY steep hill. Loose dirt and lots of brambly shrubs and branches. The footing was slippery! There wasn't much 'running' - it was more about not getting hurt. Besides some scratches and scrapes and thorny vines, we made it to the bottom. At one point, I heard a woman behind me up the hillside yell "Aaaghh! Owwww! Stickers! Stickers! Stickers!!" Yikes.
We climbed back up out the ravine, refilled water bottles then made our way back toward the vineyard. After trudging up a dirt road and negotiating a long line of tires a la football practice high stepping, it was time for the supersized slip n' slide.
For me, it was a great run down the slope. My Redhook hat flew off, sitting right smack in the middle of the run about halfway down. No worries - Camera Crew snagged it on her way down, in between screams. When I got to the bottom, I was going so fast I shot off the end of the plastic, rolled several times in the mud and wound up in the shrubbery. It was so off-the-charts awesome that I received the 'Big Slipper' award, something of which I am very proud to have earned. Think about it: I was the first winner of this award at the first running of the race. That's, like, history happening right there in front of your face, people!
Camera Crew still has night sweats from the slip n' slide. She claims to have PTSD, in fact. But she did get my hat, which was very nice of her, considering she was in the midst of extreme terror.
In fact, here is Free Gift to Kevin #2: I named the slip n' slide for you.
You should call it Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. And here's why:
From a distance, it looks pretty great and totally obtainable; as you get closer, you realize it's way better than you thought and you're getting excited; but you're wondering if you should even take a shot at it, fearing it might just be out of your league; you decide - what the hell - you're going for it; you hop on, wondering what the ride will bring; it takes a little persistence to get the thing going; then it takes off so fast, you're actually a little afraid; it's bumpy and fast and exciting and scary, all at the same time; the next thing you know, it's done with you and it dumps you so fast your head spins; you find yourself in the mud and sticker bushes, a quick check to make sure you're not hurt; you stand up, feeling all manly, a look back up the hill, a big ol' smile, then - WOOOO! - you want to do it all over again!!! But you know you can't look back because it would never be as good as it was. In fact, you realize you just avoided dying.
After a trot back up the hill to the vineyard, we zagged and zigged our way back through the vineyard, reversing what we did on the way out. I'll admit - I was beat. Camera Crew kept me going and we finished up 'Whine on the Vine'. I would say that it was one of the harder XDog Events. We ate watermelon and had mimosas made with J. Albin's brut rose bubbles. After the awards were handed (Big Slipper, thank you) we settled in on the deck of the tasting room, enjoyed a bottle of pinot gris and pretzels. We also brought home a bottle of bubbles. We drank that later, after a good chilling.
Whine on the Vine - a huge success. Great work Kalvi and Kevin! Bring this one back next year!
And good luck to Newberg's lacrosse teams!!
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Fighting Evil - A Trilogy
The super delicious villain, Elephant Ear!
And the insanely tasty Hot Dog (who was - hellooo! - LATE!)
And finally, the evil mastermind genius, Katz Woman!
And the insane
And finally, the evil mastermind genius, Katz Woman!
Edamame Man and Blueberry Tart
Hello, mortals!
Edamame Man here, reporting on Event 36 in this silly 50@50 Project. Although the mortals, Dave and Camera Crew, are my earth friends, I still think it's silly to have to take an entire year to do fifty races. Why, Blueberry Tart and I could complete 50 events in 50 seconds, if we decided - and if Edamame Man's back held up. I would need to stretch first and hope there was no lifting of objects over, say, 25 earth pounds.
Some super heroes are called to action via fancy spotlights, like Batman. Or they just listen for trouble, like Superman. Us? Dave contacted us through the usual method - he found us at the all-you-can-eat wonderfulness of Hometown Buffet on SE 82nd Ave in Portland. www.hometownbuffet.com Of course, I was only there to monitor the eating habits of you mortals and NOT to partake in helping after delicious helping of this food you call 'gravy'.
You see, mortals - Edamame Man fights for nutritious snack foods for all! I received my powers for fighting evil unhealthy foods and my arch-nemesis, Fat Snacks, during a lightning storm in 2006. It was a dark and stormy night. I was home alone, nuking a pizza so I could melt extra cheese over it once it was hot. My dinner was ruined and my dessert plans - to lick up the grease from the pepperoni - were foiled when a bolt of lightning struck the transformer outside my apartment, sending 19 gazillion gigamegananovoltwattohms into my body via the microwave. As luck would have it, I had recently started dating this woman who, in addition to having excellent taste in men, ate foods that were very healthy. She had brought over this thing called 'edamame' and left some in my freezer. When I was zapped I fell backwards, knocking the freezer door open. As the electricity coursed through me, edamame fell out of the freezer and into my mouth, transforming me into...
Edamame Man!!!
Blueberry Tart got her name because she has blue eyes, great legs and, well, you've seen pictures so you know she rocks the color blue!
Together, it's our duty to do whatever it takes to fight for nutrition and healthy foods for all of mankind!
But remember - Hometown Buffet doesn't open until 11, so if there is evil threatening to take over the world before 11 AM, well, you're out of luck. I know it may be an inconvenience but we aren't at that level of 'super' yet that we can just drop everything else and sit by thegravy phone waiting for super villains to strike fear into the hearts of mankind, or whatever it is they do that gets y'all so worked up.
This race was called the Super Hero Fun Run and was a fundraiser for the Oregon Music Hall of Fame, which supports music programs in the public schools. They also provide scholarships for high school seniors who are continuing their music studies in college. Edamame Man and Blueberry Tart strongly agree with this charity. Music is important to society and it disappoints us greatly that music programs are cut from schools. Read more about the musical mortals and the support they provide at www.omhof.org
We arrived at the race via MAX train. Yes, we could have used our powers to get there much faster. And by 'powers' I mean 'car' - but parking is such a hassle. Besides, it's good for the mortals of this city to see their heroes up close and personal whilst we rode on the train. Although Edamame Man wishes the one homeless gentleman with the garbage bag full of empty beer cans wouldn't have been so 'up close and personal' as to smell his super power. Oy.
It was good to mingle with the other heroes, many of whom we haven't seen in quite some time. Seems a lot of them have been busy filming movies like 'The XMen' and 'The Avengers'. Blah blah blah. They think they are soooo cool. Edamame Man is just waiting for the call from Stan Lee to be in the next SpiderMan flick. Waiting. And waiting.
Let's see - Wolverine is still sporting those ridiculous sideburns. 'Hello, Wolvie - the '70's called - they want their sideburns back!' Haha - zing! Wonder Woman was looking fine, but Edamame Man had to be careful that Blueberry Tart didn't catch me using my x-ray vision, if you know what I mean. Hulk still has issues - he wouldn't even talk to me and refused to fist-bump Blueberry Tart. Jerk. And we saw Batman, who looked like he had, um, er, let himself go a little. He didn't look like he had eaten at Hometown Buffet - he looked like he had eaten an entire Hometown Buffet! Visited with The Incredibles - they are a neat family. We invited them over for a BBQ - we'll see.
It was time to start the race, finally! There were a LOT of little kids in this event. Lots of families there enjoying the morning together. Most people were dressed up like their favorite super hero. I scanned the entire crowd using my super vision - okay, I'm actually just tall so can see over the heads - and didn't see a single mortal dressed like Edamame Man. This hurts a little, people - inside. Blueberry Tart to the rescue! She suggested that the Edamame Man costumes were all sold out in advance for Halloween. Ahhh! This made perfect sense! Of course!
The race was underway!
Now, we realize we haven't done as many races as Dave and Camera Crew but we also realize that this was a pretty crappy course layout for a race that is designed to attract lots of little ones and lots of strollers. The route took us north along the water front, through Saturday Market, down the big curb and across the MAX tracks, UP several flights of stairs to the Burnside Bridge, across then DOWN more stairs to the East Bank Esplanade. I mean, come on. Mortal women struggling with strollers, little kids running around in view-obstructing masks, etc. Maybe next time a simple one level, flat, out and back route will suffice. Of course, it was no problem for us because we're super heroes, although the stairs caused Edamame Man's hip to ache like he had just been lashed by Catwoman's whip. Meeee-OW!!
We finished the race, no problem. We were a little disappointed that we were not noticed as much as some of the other heroes. No autograph requests means I carried these Sharpies for NO REASON WHATSOEVER. Gawd.
We were happy to help out our mortal friends by completing this event, number 36, in the 50@50 Project.
Mortals, I must take leave now. Blueberry Tart awaits at our booth - and I have just noticed they've put out a fresh pot of gravy...
Edamame Man here, reporting on Event 36 in this silly 50@50 Project. Although the mortals, Dave and Camera Crew, are my earth friends, I still think it's silly to have to take an entire year to do fifty races. Why, Blueberry Tart and I could complete 50 events in 50 seconds, if we decided - and if Edamame Man's back held up. I would need to stretch first and hope there was no lifting of objects over, say, 25 earth pounds.
Some super heroes are called to action via fancy spotlights, like Batman. Or they just listen for trouble, like Superman. Us? Dave contacted us through the usual method - he found us at the all-you-can-eat wonderfulness of Hometown Buffet on SE 82nd Ave in Portland. www.hometownbuffet.com Of course, I was only there to monitor the eating habits of you mortals and NOT to partake in helping after delicious helping of this food you call 'gravy'.
You see, mortals - Edamame Man fights for nutritious snack foods for all! I received my powers for fighting evil unhealthy foods and my arch-nemesis, Fat Snacks, during a lightning storm in 2006. It was a dark and stormy night. I was home alone, nuking a pizza so I could melt extra cheese over it once it was hot. My dinner was ruined and my dessert plans - to lick up the grease from the pepperoni - were foiled when a bolt of lightning struck the transformer outside my apartment, sending 19 gazillion gigamegananovoltwattohms into my body via the microwave. As luck would have it, I had recently started dating this woman who, in addition to having excellent taste in men, ate foods that were very healthy. She had brought over this thing called 'edamame' and left some in my freezer. When I was zapped I fell backwards, knocking the freezer door open. As the electricity coursed through me, edamame fell out of the freezer and into my mouth, transforming me into...
Edamame Man!!!
Blueberry Tart got her name because she has blue eyes, great legs and, well, you've seen pictures so you know she rocks the color blue!
Together, it's our duty to do whatever it takes to fight for nutrition and healthy foods for all of mankind!
But remember - Hometown Buffet doesn't open until 11, so if there is evil threatening to take over the world before 11 AM, well, you're out of luck. I know it may be an inconvenience but we aren't at that level of 'super' yet that we can just drop everything else and sit by the
This race was called the Super Hero Fun Run and was a fundraiser for the Oregon Music Hall of Fame, which supports music programs in the public schools. They also provide scholarships for high school seniors who are continuing their music studies in college. Edamame Man and Blueberry Tart strongly agree with this charity. Music is important to society and it disappoints us greatly that music programs are cut from schools. Read more about the musical mortals and the support they provide at www.omhof.org
We arrived at the race via MAX train. Yes, we could have used our powers to get there much faster. And by 'powers' I mean 'car' - but parking is such a hassle. Besides, it's good for the mortals of this city to see their heroes up close and personal whilst we rode on the train. Although Edamame Man wishes the one homeless gentleman with the garbage bag full of empty beer cans wouldn't have been so 'up close and personal' as to smell his super power. Oy.
It was good to mingle with the other heroes, many of whom we haven't seen in quite some time. Seems a lot of them have been busy filming movies like 'The XMen' and 'The Avengers'. Blah blah blah. They think they are soooo cool. Edamame Man is just waiting for the call from Stan Lee to be in the next SpiderMan flick. Waiting. And waiting.
Let's see - Wolverine is still sporting those ridiculous sideburns. 'Hello, Wolvie - the '70's called - they want their sideburns back!' Haha - zing! Wonder Woman was looking fine, but Edamame Man had to be careful that Blueberry Tart didn't catch me using my x-ray vision, if you know what I mean. Hulk still has issues - he wouldn't even talk to me and refused to fist-bump Blueberry Tart. Jerk. And we saw Batman, who looked like he had, um, er, let himself go a little. He didn't look like he had eaten at Hometown Buffet - he looked like he had eaten an entire Hometown Buffet! Visited with The Incredibles - they are a neat family. We invited them over for a BBQ - we'll see.
It was time to start the race, finally! There were a LOT of little kids in this event. Lots of families there enjoying the morning together. Most people were dressed up like their favorite super hero. I scanned the entire crowd using my super vision - okay, I'm actually just tall so can see over the heads - and didn't see a single mortal dressed like Edamame Man. This hurts a little, people - inside. Blueberry Tart to the rescue! She suggested that the Edamame Man costumes were all sold out in advance for Halloween. Ahhh! This made perfect sense! Of course!
The race was underway!
Now, we realize we haven't done as many races as Dave and Camera Crew but we also realize that this was a pretty crappy course layout for a race that is designed to attract lots of little ones and lots of strollers. The route took us north along the water front, through Saturday Market, down the big curb and across the MAX tracks, UP several flights of stairs to the Burnside Bridge, across then DOWN more stairs to the East Bank Esplanade. I mean, come on. Mortal women struggling with strollers, little kids running around in view-obstructing masks, etc. Maybe next time a simple one level, flat, out and back route will suffice. Of course, it was no problem for us because we're super heroes, although the stairs caused Edamame Man's hip to ache like he had just been lashed by Catwoman's whip. Meeee-OW!!
We finished the race, no problem. We were a little disappointed that we were not noticed as much as some of the other heroes. No autograph requests means I carried these Sharpies for NO REASON WHATSOEVER. Gawd.
We were happy to help out our mortal friends by completing this event, number 36, in the 50@50 Project.
Mortals, I must take leave now. Blueberry Tart awaits at our booth - and I have just noticed they've put out a fresh pot of gravy...
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Halfway Check and the Finish!!
Halfway point or thereabouts...
Camera Crew rocked this race, even chatting with the race volunteer at the finish line!!
Camera Crew rocked this race, even chatting with the race volunteer at the finish line!!
Time Time For For the the Dual Duel!
Wow, I can't believe how time flies when you're beating the crap out of your body trying to do as many events as possible in the shortest amount of time! Yeehaw! If you've been following along since the beginning, you'll know that Event 1 in the 50@50 Project was the White River Snowshoe 8k. And you'll also know that Event 50 was to be the same race next January 2014 - kind of a 'full circle' thing. For those of you who haven't been following along, I'll give you a few minutes to catch up...
(dum
dee
dum
dee
dum
dee
doo
tra
la
lala
loo
scoobydoooo...)
...okay!
Puff, puff. Hey, wait for me. Wait a second ... A FEW MINUTES!?! I'm not that far behind!
Oh, Camera Crew!
The one year time frame we had estimated to do this is now looking to be pretty damn generous. To paraphrase Dubya, we 'misoverestimated' how long it would take us to complete fifty events. In fact, by the end of this coming weekend (Aug. 9-11) with three more events - one Friday, one Saturday, one Sunday - we'll be at 40. That's forty events in less than seven months, folks. Yes, we've been pushing it some weekends. And yes, we are often not fully recovered from one race before it's time to do the next. But so far, no injuries. We may well be done before Turkey Day!
Anyway, about ORRC's Dual Duel:
In choosing events, we try to find some weird, quirky, different races to keep us interested. As I've said before, doing 50 road runs would be b-o-r-i-n-g. Event 35 in the project was certainly not boring. Teams of two would run ten miles total, laps done on a 1/4 mile track; Camera Crew and I would each run 20 laps (5 miles), alternating laps and passing a baton between us. Definitely different! In fact, in the spirit of the Dual Duel, Camera Crew will chime in on this post from time to time.
Right, Camera Crew??
You talkin' to me?
Well, it all began with a slow crawl down the ever traffic-filled Tualatin-Sherwood Highway toward the motor speedway known as I-5. Unfortunately, I had to immediately part ways with the speedway and take off on the bumper-to-bumper Hwy 217. And just when it was getting better and we were really moving, that freeway ended. And I ended up going the wrong way, only spotting the hospital sign for the way I should have gone at the very last minute - you know the one that would have required a trip to the hospital had I tried to change lanes. Instead, I got to have a very leisurely assent of the Sylvan Hill before Hwy 26 let me free. By the time I got to the race I was so enervated I drove right past Dave without even seeing him. Sorry you had to expend that extra energy walking across the parking lot!
There I was waiting and waving when you drove into the parking lot and - whoosh - right on by! (sniff)
We really didn't know for sure what to expect at this event. We knew that we would be running five miles each but had no idea how many people to expect or how 'fun' the crowd would be. Let's just say that WE had a great time. Mostly, the teams seemed very serious and focused. Many sported matching running gear. Most had heart rate monitors and coaches/family members keeping track of laps on official count sheets on which they wrote down each lap time for each runner, shouting things like "Come on! You need to cut three seconds off this lap to stay on pace!!!" Some teams had coaches jogging the course, encouraging them with "Great pace!" "Keep it up" and "Pick it up a little or Tim's gonna catch you!" Things like that.
As you probably gathered, one of the 'rules' of the race was that each team of two had to keep track of their own lap counts. We didn't bring a coach with us because we don't have a coach so we had to come up with something on our own.
I volunteered to count laps while Dave did all the running. Any guesses how well that went over?
Um... yeah.
Okay, so again, other runners were serious - read: boring. Hash marks on paper count sheets or backs of hands. Some curious rubber band abacus type counting system. Gadget driven counting (stop watch laps or iphone apps). But not us. We were gloriously innovative and fun and festooned with flowers. That's because before beginning the race we each layered on 20 plastic flower leis. It was like the muff on a fur coat - we could barely see let alone breathe. But we were the most festive team by far.
I made the mistake of putting all the leis on, then trying to pin my bib number on the front of my shirt. Brilliant, right? I am happy to say that I only poked my fingers twice with the 'un'safety pins and my bib was, surprisingly, on straight! I guess when you've pinned on 30+ race numbers, you get good at it!
I decided to have me start the race and to have Camera Crew finish. This backfired on me, of course. For some weird reason about the track being metric or the inside vs outside lanes or whatever, the starters had to run an extra 100 yards so that we made up ten miles exactly. Oh well. Once we listened to the barely audible directions, it was time to start. I wasn't too concerned with hearing the instructions because WE WERE ON A TRACK. It was like a NASCAR race - all left turns. Hand the baton to your teammate. Got it.
One of the other runners asked about the leis and when I explained, he laughed and said "Oh my god, that is Wile E. Coyote genius" - which is the highest form of compliment regarding intelligence exchanged between dudes.
The race director counted us down and we took off. Running with 20 leis bouncing in your face was interesting and surprisingly warm. Who knew a bunch of plastic flowers on a string would make you sweat so much. But we were committed to our ingenious lap count method. We definitely received curious looks from some of the bystanders. I wasn't sure if this was because of the leis or because we didn't have a coach yelling at us. People started to whisper "Oh, I get it! After each lap, they take one lei off." Ahhhh, finally - folks were catching on.
We were running five miles, but we were only running 0.25 miles at a time. How fast to run? To make that decision more complicated, I had no idea how fast I was actually running. My watch went missing back at event 24 and I have refused to replace it (assuming it will show up as soon as I buy a new one). And that big clock with the big numbers right by the track? I never remembered to look at that and do the math to get my lap time.
Pace was certainly an issue! In fact, I would finish a lap, take a breather, hand my 'lap counter' to one of two cute little kids who were following me around after each lap, jockeying for position to receive the castaway lei. Then I would look up to spot Camera Crew to gauge how much time I had. I would wander to our bag and have a drink of water, then walk over to the transition area to get ready to go again. One more look around to see where my partner was and "Where is she? Where is... Aaaagh! She's right here, handing me the damn baton!! No fair! I'm not ready!" That's how it went.
It was sure nice to shed the leis! Several times I tried counting how many were left, but they were tangled up. At this realization, I despondently accepted that if there were enough left to BE tangled, then we still had a ways to go. But - finally - I could count with confidence!! Six! Six laps to go!! Woohoo!
I feel like I ran a steady pace for all 20 laps. I tracked my lap time on the race clock a few times and was within a few seconds. It was an interesting race and a lot of fun, mostly because WE decided to have fun with it. Plus it was another rare weeknight race, so it bought us an extra event in the project.
Five more events over the next two weekends will bring us to forty!! Stay tuned!
(dum
dee
dum
dee
dum
dee
doo
tra
la
lala
loo
scoobydoooo...)
...okay!
Puff, puff. Hey, wait for me. Wait a second ... A FEW MINUTES!?! I'm not that far behind!
Oh, Camera Crew!
The one year time frame we had estimated to do this is now looking to be pretty damn generous. To paraphrase Dubya, we 'misoverestimated' how long it would take us to complete fifty events. In fact, by the end of this coming weekend (Aug. 9-11) with three more events - one Friday, one Saturday, one Sunday - we'll be at 40. That's forty events in less than seven months, folks. Yes, we've been pushing it some weekends. And yes, we are often not fully recovered from one race before it's time to do the next. But so far, no injuries. We may well be done before Turkey Day!
Anyway, about ORRC's Dual Duel:
In choosing events, we try to find some weird, quirky, different races to keep us interested. As I've said before, doing 50 road runs would be b-o-r-i-n-g. Event 35 in the project was certainly not boring. Teams of two would run ten miles total, laps done on a 1/4 mile track; Camera Crew and I would each run 20 laps (5 miles), alternating laps and passing a baton between us. Definitely different! In fact, in the spirit of the Dual Duel, Camera Crew will chime in on this post from time to time.
Right, Camera Crew??
You talkin' to me?
Well, it all began with a slow crawl down the ever traffic-filled Tualatin-Sherwood Highway toward the motor speedway known as I-5. Unfortunately, I had to immediately part ways with the speedway and take off on the bumper-to-bumper Hwy 217. And just when it was getting better and we were really moving, that freeway ended. And I ended up going the wrong way, only spotting the hospital sign for the way I should have gone at the very last minute - you know the one that would have required a trip to the hospital had I tried to change lanes. Instead, I got to have a very leisurely assent of the Sylvan Hill before Hwy 26 let me free. By the time I got to the race I was so enervated I drove right past Dave without even seeing him. Sorry you had to expend that extra energy walking across the parking lot!
There I was waiting and waving when you drove into the parking lot and - whoosh - right on by! (sniff)
We really didn't know for sure what to expect at this event. We knew that we would be running five miles each but had no idea how many people to expect or how 'fun' the crowd would be. Let's just say that WE had a great time. Mostly, the teams seemed very serious and focused. Many sported matching running gear. Most had heart rate monitors and coaches/family members keeping track of laps on official count sheets on which they wrote down each lap time for each runner, shouting things like "Come on! You need to cut three seconds off this lap to stay on pace!!!" Some teams had coaches jogging the course, encouraging them with "Great pace!" "Keep it up" and "Pick it up a little or Tim's gonna catch you!" Things like that.
As you probably gathered, one of the 'rules' of the race was that each team of two had to keep track of their own lap counts. We didn't bring a coach with us because we don't have a coach so we had to come up with something on our own.
I volunteered to count laps while Dave did all the running. Any guesses how well that went over?
Um... yeah.
Okay, so again, other runners were serious - read: boring. Hash marks on paper count sheets or backs of hands. Some curious rubber band abacus type counting system. Gadget driven counting (stop watch laps or iphone apps). But not us. We were gloriously innovative and fun and festooned with flowers. That's because before beginning the race we each layered on 20 plastic flower leis. It was like the muff on a fur coat - we could barely see let alone breathe. But we were the most festive team by far.
I made the mistake of putting all the leis on, then trying to pin my bib number on the front of my shirt. Brilliant, right? I am happy to say that I only poked my fingers twice with the 'un'safety pins and my bib was, surprisingly, on straight! I guess when you've pinned on 30+ race numbers, you get good at it!
I decided to have me start the race and to have Camera Crew finish. This backfired on me, of course. For some weird reason about the track being metric or the inside vs outside lanes or whatever, the starters had to run an extra 100 yards so that we made up ten miles exactly. Oh well. Once we listened to the barely audible directions, it was time to start. I wasn't too concerned with hearing the instructions because WE WERE ON A TRACK. It was like a NASCAR race - all left turns. Hand the baton to your teammate. Got it.
One of the other runners asked about the leis and when I explained, he laughed and said "Oh my god, that is Wile E. Coyote genius" - which is the highest form of compliment regarding intelligence exchanged between dudes.
The race director counted us down and we took off. Running with 20 leis bouncing in your face was interesting and surprisingly warm. Who knew a bunch of plastic flowers on a string would make you sweat so much. But we were committed to our ingenious lap count method. We definitely received curious looks from some of the bystanders. I wasn't sure if this was because of the leis or because we didn't have a coach yelling at us. People started to whisper "Oh, I get it! After each lap, they take one lei off." Ahhhh, finally - folks were catching on.
We were running five miles, but we were only running 0.25 miles at a time. How fast to run? To make that decision more complicated, I had no idea how fast I was actually running. My watch went missing back at event 24 and I have refused to replace it (assuming it will show up as soon as I buy a new one). And that big clock with the big numbers right by the track? I never remembered to look at that and do the math to get my lap time.
Pace was certainly an issue! In fact, I would finish a lap, take a breather, hand my 'lap counter' to one of two cute little kids who were following me around after each lap, jockeying for position to receive the castaway lei. Then I would look up to spot Camera Crew to gauge how much time I had. I would wander to our bag and have a drink of water, then walk over to the transition area to get ready to go again. One more look around to see where my partner was and "Where is she? Where is... Aaaagh! She's right here, handing me the damn baton!! No fair! I'm not ready!" That's how it went.
It was sure nice to shed the leis! Several times I tried counting how many were left, but they were tangled up. At this realization, I despondently accepted that if there were enough left to BE tangled, then we still had a ways to go. But - finally - I could count with confidence!! Six! Six laps to go!! Woohoo!
I feel like I ran a steady pace for all 20 laps. I tracked my lap time on the race clock a few times and was within a few seconds. It was an interesting race and a lot of fun, mostly because WE decided to have fun with it. Plus it was another rare weeknight race, so it bought us an extra event in the project.
Five more events over the next two weekends will bring us to forty!! Stay tuned!
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